Apple’s Tax Tango: E.U. Court Wades Through the Doughboy Drama
Summary
In a wild courtroom drama that could rival any blockbuster, Apple Inc. just faced off against the European Union and lost—big time! They found themselves on the losing side of a €13 billion ($14.4 billion) tax tussle with Ireland. That’s enough cash to buy quite a few pizzas for the entire Cook family! The E.U. Court of Justice in Luxembourg stood firm, waving goodbye to Apple’s previous victory like it was an ex who just showed up with a rebound. This ruling gives a resounding thumbs up to the antitrust czar Margrethe Vestager, who appears to have a knack for shaking up the tech giants like a cocktail shaker at happy hour. Back in 2016, Vestager made waves (and a fair bit of outrage across the pond) when she called out Ireland for giving Apple a tax deal that was as friendly as a golden retriever at a dog park. Apparently, this special treatment allowed Apple to dodge taxes like it was playing a game of dodgeball, while the rest of us were just standing there trying not to get hit by tax bills ourselves! Ireland insisted they weren’t playing favorites (after all, who doesn’t love a good underdog story?), but the Court of Justice said it’s more like the Irish government was serving up tax breaks on a silver platter. Apple’s response? A classic corporate sigh: “We’re disappointed with today’s decision.” While Apple’s stocks took a small dip—down 1.3% like a sad puppy—Ireland isn’t too worried it seems. The country has become a tech haven, and this ruling is less of a disaster and more like an unnecessary detour on the expressway. Tim Cook, ever the dramatic CEO, previously blasted the E.U.’s actions as “total political crap,” which sounds like either a bad sequel or a quirky indie film nobody asked for. Meanwhile, the U.S. Treasury chimed in, suggesting the E.U. might be making a grand leap into “supra-national tax authority” territory, like trying on fancy pants that just don’t fit. The drama all circles back to Apple’s original tax deals in ‘91 and ‘07, which Vestager’s team claims were about as real as a unicorn. They argued that the so-called “head office” was just a paper tiger begging for attention. In this ongoing saga, the judges have backed Vestager’s quest against shady tax practices that are, quite frankly, the exact opposite of everyone’s favorite party game of Monopoly, where everyone pays up. Apple was a pioneer in setting up shop in Ireland thanks to some juicy offers back in the day—but hey, times have changed, and so too have the rules of the tax game. It looks like Apple just got hit with a big ol’ tax bill to prove that sometimes, even tech titans have to bow to the law. Who knew that tax breaks could turn into tax heartbreaks? Just a reminder—no matter how big your empire is, in the world of taxes, you can’t always get what you want!
Original Source: time.com
